Our Story
by rionr
Summary: I was sure he was the one for me, he is my forever I was sure she was the one for me, she is my forever Edward and Bella meet in High School, fall in love and head off to college A split, A break up, no one knows what happened, only shattered lives remains, Bella is missing and Edward won't talk. Their worlds are about to collide
1. Chapter 1

Prologue

The drive is long and I am tried, I have been on the road for the past 2 weeks, stopping on off. We spent some in Montana, where Emmett, Rosalie and Charlotte spend some time with Emmett's parents before joining me. Alice and Jasper are due back from their honeymoon in 2 weeks. We will all gather at my childhood home as we decide on our next move. Odd, how we have become as close as siblings. We are friends who have decided we want to be together always as that was what was important to us.

I look back, Charlie is sleeping in the back seat, strapped in, game boy still in his hands as he sleeps, his head hanging oddly to the side, mouth open. He looks so much like Edward, his father.

Edward… he been in my thoughts more than usual, not only looking at Charlie is a reminder, but returning here has been plaguing my thoughts, bringing up memories I don't want to remember

I am entering a the little town of Forks, where I grew up with my dad, Charlie and my son's namesake, another 10 minutes I will be home, in my childhood home.

Chapter 1

**Bella**

I awake with a start, Charlie jumping on the bed, "We made it" he says smiling; he just lost one of his front teeth, so his smile looks lopsided and very cute. Ruffling his crazy ass hair inherited from his father, I laugh "Yes we did, now get off me so I can get to the bathroom, or I going to go potty right here on the bed"

'Potty, really mom, who says potty anymore" he snorts, "You need to piss?"

"Charles Edward Swan, do not let me hear you say that word, where did you hear that word" I am shocked

"umm Uncle Jasper, I told him had to go and I heard him tell Auntie Alice I had to take a piss", he quickly covers his mouth with his hand, eyes wide and the tips of his ear red. "It's ok" I say, Potty is too much a baby word, he just turned 6, how about "pee" I say let's use the word " pee rather than piss"

"ok' he says, a bright smile lighting up his beautiful face, " you gotta pee?" he asks.

I huff yes, jump out of bed and head to the bathroom, "go get changed, we need food, we need to go grocery shopping" I hear a muffled response, running feet, he is off.

I used the bathroom and grab a tooth brush and start my morning routine. Welcome home Bella Swan, I mutter as get ready to face my hometown, memories and all.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**Edward**

I try to read the lasted article on the rise of childhood diabetes and new ways to address the growing epidemic. Tanya prattles on, I try to distract myself with reading and her prattling on and on about maybe having a winter wedding rather than wait until next June, I really don't care when. I am in semi state of panic. I am returning home, if you can call it home, it has been 6 years, was last there, the summer after, after, I can't even think her name without my chest tightening, the air around me become stuffy, I can't breathe , my ears are ringing, I get up hurriedly and head for the bathroom. I can hear Tanya asking me if I am ok, I reach the bathroom, slide in and lock the door, it is small and cramped not much room for my 6' 2". I grab the counter, I have not felt like this for a while, I have to get it under control. I don't look at myself, I know what I will see and not today, not now.

I splash water on my face, take a deep breath and hope I can pull this off. I flip the lid down and sit.

I can do this, I have to do this, it is time, I am heading home, where I went high school, where I met her, fell in love, I was heading home to memories and all.


	3. Chapter 3

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. These are short chapters, drabbles really that I will try to update daily. I have no idea how long it will be. This is my very first attempt at writing. Not Beta'ed all mistakes are my own.

Chapter 3

**Tanya **

I am crazy about Edward. He is everything I want in a man. I love him. I have dreamed about being his wife. Dr & Mrs. Edward Cullen, God I can't wait for that day, but today we are on our way to visit and spend 2 weeks with his parents. God help me.

Edward is easy, laid back, never demanding and allows me to make most of the decisions. He never talks about living in Forks, WA. I know he grew up in Chicago, but moved here when he was about to enter high school, his parents wanted a slower life, so they moved to this small country town. Weird if you ask me, I mean you could get slower in the suburbs, you don't have to move to a small town.

Edward has not been back since he left for College, who can blame him, I did a little pre trip checking on Forks, the population is around 1100 people. I have been to concerts with larger crowds.

I love that Edward is laid back and let me take care of things, funny.. he is sort of old fashion, we don't live together, we have sex, amazing hot sex but we have never spent a night together, he always leaves for an early shift or he stays away saying he needs to sleep in. Well that is going to change soon.

I wonder how his parents will be this time. I have met them once, after we got engaged. They had flown in after Edward told them of our engagement.

Edward has been in the bathroom for a while, I hate seeing him like this, he absolutely does not want to be here, yet why he agreed to visit is beyond me.


	4. Chapter 4

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. These are short chapters, drabbles really that I will try to update daily. I have no idea how long it will be. This is my very first attempt at writing. Not Beta'ed all mistakes are my own.

Chapter 4

**Bella**

Charlie was ready before I was, full of burning energy as he clambered into the car snapping his seat belt in place, he was growing up so fast it was scary at times.

"Breakfast at the Diner or we can get the groceries and I can make you breakfast at home" I ask Charlie.

"I want panqakes, eggss, bacon and hash browns" his missing tooth causing his "S" to whistle.

"Thanks Emmett" I mutter. "The diner it will be, then grocery shopping". I am rewarded with his cute lopsided smile and his newly learned fist pump, courtesy of Emmett. I laugh, he is my joy, my heart, my sweet, sweet baby boy.

"The Fork and Spoon", I know the diner is called "The Fork and Spoon" a play of the town itself. The Fork and Spoon Diner in the town of Forks. We make it to the diner in no time and as park and look at the diner. The rush of memories, our first date, the first time we held hands and of hand holding that led to our first kiss, my first kiss and his first kiss. So many firsts. Charlie is ready to go and bounding out of the car. I unhook my seat belt, climb out of the car. Charlie slips his hand in mine and in we go.

The walls are the same, newly painted but the same yellow walls with posters and pictures of anyone famous that passed thru here. There was the board of the monster burger winners, who each winner listed there, had to eat a fully loaded 5 lbs burger in 30 minutes or less to win and not pay for the burger , if they lost they had to pay the $50.00 cost. Edward never tried neither did I. We had seen too many lose their burgers part way to even been interested. I should bring Emmett here; he is a bottomless pit where food is involved.

I don't see anyone I know, a teenager takes our order, it summer, she looks bored as she writes. The Lumber Jack Special, I will share with Charlie, Coffee for me and milk for Charlie.


	5. Chapter 5

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. These are short chapters, drabbles really that I will try to update daily. I have no idea how long it will be. This is my very first attempt at writing. Not Beta'ed all mistakes are my own.

Chapter 5

**Esme**

"Carlisle", I call out, I am heading to the supermarket, I forgot the Ice- Cream, what time will Edward be here?" I ask pushing his study door open.

He looks up and smiles, "Will we be having your famous Apple and Cheddar Cheese apple pie to go with the ice cream?"

"Yes, but you my dear, are limited to one piece, I made it for Edward and besides you need to lower your cholesterol and apple pie and Ice- Cream are not the best for you" he smiles softly at me and says " Tanya will be here too"

"I know and I have accepted" I state, knowing this is what he wants to hear, with that I turn to leave. He calls out they should be here around 1:00pm, I nod my head not trusting to answer as I feel the overwhelming sense of loss.

I have truly lost my daughter. For a long time I was angry with Edward for never telling me what happened. I still don't know, as he refused to talk about it. It was a shock, a nightmare and completely bewildering when Edward could not tell me where Bella was. He had just found out, had heard our messages and was in an equal state of panic, how he could not know where she was, they lived together for Christ's sake, but he was not with her, he had taken off to on a road trip with some college buddies for 4 weeks; which was news to us. In that time, Bella had buried her father by herself and vanished. Carlisle and I were on a 6 week European tour. Upon returning, Carlisle had gone into hospital as courtesy, he still had another week off and it was then we found out about of Charlie's death, he had a heart attack while driving, he had managed to park and called 911, but he was dead before EMS could arrive.

We had offered for Edward and Bella to come with us on the trip, but Edward had refused saying they wanted to spend their first summer together and Bella had insisted on finding a job for the summer to cover the remaining cost that her scholarship did not cover. The week before we left, I had spoken with Bella and she was sick the stomach flu, she was having a rough time, 2 months ago she had to have her wisdom teeth extracted and then to be hit with the flu, finals were upon them and we were playing phone tag quite a bit. Edward had changed too, he and Carlisle were arguing quite a bit, his grades had been slipping and his 'emergency credit card" use seemed high with non-practical purchases. He was always out whenever I called and most times after speaking with his father he was combative and defensive. I had asked Bella about it and she mentioned that he was under a lot of stress with school. I could understand both Bella and Edward we driven and highly motivated. Edward wanted to follow in his father's footsteps and become a doctor and Bella wanted to be a teacher. Bella had a full scholarship to the University Of Washington and only a partial at NYU, but she and Edward decided to attend NYU and it was where Edward wanted to go. I head to the supermarket, I cant stop thinking Edward is making a mistake with Tanya, but what did I want, Bella chose not to be part of our lives , did I expect my only son to not to have a life. I dont know. I really dont know what to think.


	6. Chapter 6

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. These are short chapters, drabbles really that I will try to update daily. I have no idea how long it will be. This is my very first attempt at writing. Not Beta'ed all mistakes are my own.

Chapter 6

This longer than that normal but didnt want to break it in half and I wanted to have more interaction between Charlie and Bella, showing their bond.

Bella

The Diner is not very busy, we must have missed the breakfast crowd and it is too early for Lunch. Our food arrives and Charlie digs in, chewing and trying to talk at the same time, his missing tooth creating a perfect channel for pieces of food to come flying out. I laugh and I tell him not to talk and eat, so he hums and tap his feet to some melody in his head, so much like his father and me. music he was wired for music, it made since after all both of his parents loved, played and wrote music.

Music, it was what brought us together. The songs we tried to write together, the music we made. I reach for my cell phone and call Emmett while Charlie continues to eat, hum and tap with his feet on the base of the booth seating in the diner. I am overwhelmed being here in this diner, too many memories, I need Emmett, it goes to voice mail and I leave him a message.

"Hey Bear, we made it safely here and we miss you guys like crazy. Call me and say hi to Rose and Char, love you guys" I turn the phone to Charlie, "Say hi to Uncle Emmett"

" Oncle Emm, when are you coming , I miss you, can you come tomorrow pleasse" he says, food flying and a huge gob of pancake lands on the phone and my hand, he looks at the gooey mush and laughs, which only causes more chunks of pancake mush to fly.

"Oh gross", I say laughing at his happy smiling face and just like that my mood lifts, Charlie.

Charlie has always had that effect on me, from the day he was born, my world, my life had meaning once again as I learned to live again.

"Are you done" I ask "and do you still want the hash browns?", he wrinkles his nose.

"It's ok, we can take it home and you can have it later, if you want" I reassure.

"ok, but can we buy bacon, I like bacon and Char likes bacon too, we could keep some for her" he pipes in

"Sure, now let's get you cleaned up", I look at my arm and phone "and me too I guess" I grab a few napkins and in no time we are cleaned and ready to go. "Do you need to use the bathroom", I ask

" nope, I went at home and I put the sssseat down like you said I must, even though Char is not here to fall in"

My son loves Char, he would do anything for her, so I told him that Char would fall in if he didn't put the toilet seat back down after using it. No seat problems after that.

We leave the diner, Charlie grabs my hand and swings it, bouncing up and down, I wish I had half the energy he has "Mama, did you grow up here?" he asks

"yep, I live here with my Dad, your grandpa"

"Grandpa, whossse name I have have? His "S" whistling as he asks

"The same", I say, " Charles Swan, your grandfather was the chief of police "

"Chief, he wasss a injun, did he have a bow and arrow and put paint on his face, uncle Jazz says all injuns have arrows and knives and long hair" he stops, thinks " grandpa don't have long hair, did he have long hair when you were little like me, I don't want long hair, Char hair is long and it gets tangles and Aunt Rose always make her cry when combs it, will my hair get tangleees if I become a chief" he rushes on,

I just listen for now at some point he will stop, if there is a question he really wants an answer, if not he will just keep going and going. The engerzier bunny pops to mind and I am still smiling.

"do I get a horse as a chief, uncle Jazz says injuns ride horses, can I get a horse mama, please can I get a horse? "

We have reached the car, " No horse, it can't fit in your room" I say laughing, I can't even remember all he asked few seconds ago.

"where did grandpa keep his horsey?" he asks.

Oh yeah, I remember now.

"Charlie, grandpa, was not an Indian and he did not ride a horse, he was a police officer and drove a police car. When you are a police officer for a long time, they make you the chief", I try my best to explain it in a way that he could understand

He nods "I going to be a police officer and a chief, not a injun chief, a police chief when I grow up, so I can catch bad people"

I laugh, "You will make a good police chief officer, just like your grandpa"

"Yep" he mimics my yes word from earlier" I have grandpa name, my dad name and your name, was my dad a police chief too?

" No" I say, the older he gets the more he asks about his dad at random times, more now he knows Char has a mom and a dad" and you don't have my name" I add

"Yess", he says," I am a swan like you".

"yes, you do indeed have my name" I say as we pull out and head for the only supermarket in Forks.

Charlie loves hanging on to the cart as I push, he hardly ever asks for anything now; he is older and knows money is always tight. We make our way thru the aisles picking up the much needed groceries making our way to the check out. Charlie asks what we are going to do next while we are waiting in the check out line.

We have to unpack and get settled I remind him, we will be here for a bit and your Aunties and Uncles will be here soon. I remind him. In my head I remind myself of the many important decisions to be made as we plan our future. He nods, losing interest in my response and conversation as he spies a bottle of bubbles. I grab the bottle of bubbles for Charlie to play with as I will be busy when I get back home, his bottle green eyes lighting up. " For me" he asks, when a voice from my past pulls me up.

"Bella! Bella Swan is that you?

' Hi " I say , I am unprepared, I mean I knew at some point this would happen, I would be seen, found out, I knew this all when we decided to spend the next few months here, but I am not ready, it is too soon. I want to grab Charlie and run. Slowly I turn and look up.

"Hi" I mutter, my hands are suddenly clammy, my stomach churns, blood rushing in my head and I try to plaster a bright fake smile on my face.


	7. Chapter 7

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. These are short chapters, drabbles really that I will try to update daily. I have no idea how long it will be. This is my very first attempt at writing.

Long work day 14 hours,, whew! , anyway here is today's update, got it in before midnight

It's long, hopefully that make up for the lateness and the typos, too spent to review, in my fatigue, I would read pass my errors as I know what I want to say my head is too mushy to proof read. i just came home and pounded this chapter out. Sleep needed.

Hope you all have a good night. On to Edward's POV and a glimpse into Bella and Edward's past.

Chapter 7

**Edward**

I don't how long I sit in this cramped bathroom, I breathe in and out thru my mouth taking really large gulps of air. I have not had a panic attack in about 4 years. I would most likely still be having them if it was not for Kate.

Kate, I should call her, but I am on a plane, not an option, I don't even have my anxiety medication with me as I have not needed it for a while. I could call her and have her call in a script for me or I think of my other options. I could ask my dad but this would only lead to questions, I could write my own, but it is not ethical to be writing my own scripts. I guess I will call Kate.

I feel better, the breathing helped and I have a plan, feeling better, I leave the bathroom & head back to my seat. Tanya looks concerned and asks if everything is ok?

I told her I needed to use the bathroom and I was fine. I grab my iPod and pretend to listen to music, but I don't turn it on. I order a gin and tonic and try to keep in that relaxed state.

"You are not ok "Tanya says, I pretend I don't hear, she grabs by head phone.

"What is going on Edward, you have been out of sorts, since we boarded the plane and now you are drinking?"

I don't answer, I grab my head phones back , this time I turn it on my IPod to drown out the her voice and my thoughts. Tanya looks angry and sad, I think but I am not sure , I can't deal with her questions right now, I am trying hard to stay focus in the present and not let the past swallow me up.

The stewardess arrives with my drink.

"What is your limit on alcoholic beverages for passengers". I ask

"6, providing you don't become too impaired" she says smiling.

"I guess I am behind", I say trying my hardest to sound relaxed and flirty, "better make this a triple "

"Sure thing" she says glancing over at Tanya as she leaves.

"Who is going to drive?" Tanya asks, I smile and say "I will, don't worry"

My drinks arrive, I slam them down, in a short while I am buzzed, I feel nothing, no that is not true my lips feel tingly. I order two more drinks and soon, I feeling nothing and all I hear is music.

Default is playing, the words wash over me, thru me

**_Maybe I missed you_**  
**_Maybe it's true_**  
**_Maybe I didn't do enough to hold onto you_**  
**_Maybe you'll think back_**  
**_On the good times we had_**  
**_Maybe one day this feeling won't remind me of you_**

**_It took some time now, I know_**  
**_It's a little too late_**  
**_I'm in this world all alone_**  
**_And now I see it's over_**  
**_Out of time_**

**_I wish I never said goodbye_**  
**_All the times I never tried_**  
**_I couldn't find your love when I lost my way_**  
**_But as time went on and on_**  
**_I didn't know we were meant to be_**  
**_Now I'm dying cuz I couldn't see_**  
**_I threw it away_**  
**_Now it's a little too late_**

**_It should have been easy_**  
**_It seemed so hard_**  
**_I could never see that we were better apart_**  
**_I should have been the one to hold you_**  
**_I should have been the one you run to_**  
**_Turned around just in time to see you fade_**  
**_A memory of you_**

**_It took some time now, I know_**  
**_It's a little too late_**  
**_I'm in this world all alone_**  
**_And now I see it's over_**  
**_Out of time_**

**_I wish I never said goodbye_**  
**_All the times I never tried_**  
**_I couldn't find your love when I lost my way_**  
**_But as time went on and on_**  
**_I didn't know we were meant to be_**  
**_Now I'm dying cuz I couldn't see_**  
**_I threw it away_**  
**_Now it's a little too late_**

**_I remember when I said goodbye_**  
**_I can`t forget the tears that you cried_**  
**_I pretend that I was over you_**  
**_I let you go and I don't know why_**

**_It took some time now, I know_**

**_I wish I never said goodbye_**  
**_All the times I never tried_**  
**_I couldn't find your love when I lost my way_**  
**_But as time went on and on_**  
**_I didn't know we were meant to be_**  
**_Now I'm dying cuz I couldn't see_**  
**_I threw it away_**  
**_Now it's a little too late_**

**_Too late too late tool late_**  
**_It's a little too late (too late, too late, too late)_**  
**_It's a little too late (too late, too late, too late)_**  
**_Now it's a little too late_**

**_If I could only go back in time, if I could only see her one more time, hear her voice one more time._**

**_The last time she called, I was so desperate, angry, confused. It replays in my half drunk state._**

_**January -6 years earlier.**_

She was begging, her voice soft, full of hurt and pain "please Edward, I promise I will pay you back, please"

"No", I said, "tell me where you are, you left and now you want me to help you, you can keep calling but I am not going to give you shit"

She has called me every day for the last four day asking to borrow $5000.00, leaving messages it was the first I had heard from her in 7 months, and to send it via western union. Today I stayed home all day, just to make sure I am here when she calls.

"Please Edward, I am begging, please, please", her voice cracking

"No, Bella, if you want it come and get it, it has been 7 months. 7 fucking months without a fucking word from you. You know where I live, the same fucking place you left, I am still here, but I guess you know that, cuz you sure as hell know where to call me, when you want something from me." Anger and hurt flowing thru me like liquid heat. I could hear crying in the back ground. I feel good, I want to hurt her back, I want to make her suffer and hurt as I have been. My life has been meaningless since she left.

"Edward, I…. I am''.

"You are what" I yell cutting her off, "Sorry, know what? I don't want to hear that shit, if you were sorry you would tell me, you would explain" I could hear her crying harder now, but it feels good to hurt her and I want to, I want to hurt her so badly because she hurt me. My hurt and rage mounting "you know what? you are so fucking fake, a cheat and a fucking whore, go back to where ever the fuck you crawled out from, I rage on, " I am happy you fucking left, it was the best thing you ever did for me, the very best thing, my life is better with you not in it and don't even think of calling my mom because she hates you too.

I hear the most heart wrenching cry as my words have done the deed, and then her pain becomes my pain. This is not right, I don't really want to hurt her, I want her back, I just want her back, that is all I want , please god, please somebody, anybody " Bella!,.. Bella! Bella I am sorry I didn't mean it", but it's like she can't hear me. All I hear is her whispers and whispering, then I was crying, because something is wrong, really wrong and I don't know where she is and I feel my like my heart is going to stop,I want her, I need her, I have to find her "BELLA! BELLA! , I am sorry, I am sorry, I love you, I love you, baby please , please" I am begging now. Nothing, no answer, only her whispers, I stop talking try to listen, it is a muffled, broken voice saying the same thing over and over " I can't do this anymore, I can't do this anymore, I can't do this anymore, I can't do this anymore" then line goes dead and my world implodes, shattering all around me, because I knew in that moment, the very second the line went dead, I had lost her.


	8. Chapter 8

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga.

Before I said the chapters would be short and some will be long, I have no idea how many chapters it will be in the end. This is my very first attempt at writing.

Chapter 8

**Tanya**

Carlisle and Esme Cullen or should I say Dr and Mrs. Carlisle Cullen, his father was pleasant and easy to talk to, his mom, a total bitch, she did not say much, except to offer her congratulations asked when we were going to get a ring, while it was not an odd question as I had planned the engagement, but chose to let Edward get a ring after the announcement. We had only been engaged for about 3 weeks then

Edward had looked at her with a puzzled look and she had shaken her head, I could feel some tension in the air between them, what a hag she was. I felt she was a making a judgment on us because we hadn't gotten a ring as yet, however the way Edward was looking at her, I felt like it was directed at him.

Esme is from old money, but she had defied her parents and married Carlisle. I gave her credit for that. I did my homework on the Cullens, when you are as wealthy as I am, you can never be too careful with fortune hunters. Edward's family was wealthy, so was Edward, he had a huge trust fund set up by his maternal grandparents.

My family had welcomed Edward into our family. My dad had helped Edward into obtaining the residency he needed to launch his career.

I am well connected. My father sits on the board for Massachusetts General Hospital, where he has made sure that Edward got his residency. We met by accident at a medical conference, I am the sales director of the Denali Enterprises, our family owed business. We manufacture medical equipment and devices. I was there to promote a new product that could help parents and doctors better manage their children's medical history better, so no matter where they were with a with a few key strokes, their medical history could be accessed, for families with chronically ill children or adults, this could be a life saver. I had the children and adolescent division.

Edward gets back from the bathroom, He is distant, starts drinking, which is very odd as he rarely drinks and flirted with the stewardess. I leave him alone as it appears he doesn't want to talk, this I know how to do, _give a man space_, I learned it from my mother,she has my dad wrapped around her fingers. I look over at Edward, his eyes are closed, but he is not relaxed after a long while he sighs, open his eyes, rubs them, then stare straight ahead. I slip my hand in his and rub my thumb over his. He looks at me, he looks so sad.

"I am worried about you, you…. You just seem… I don't know, I am here Edward if you want to talk, ok" I know most people see me as a bitch and don't get me wrong I can be blunt and some people have a difficult time with that, once I said I hated men that wear plaid flannel shirts, his friend Kate was annoyed with my statement, I don't like Kate, Edward and her had a thing once, but she can't get it thru her heard it is over, always calling, texting and emailing him,

'I am sorry" he says "I have not been home for a while and home… well home, home has a lot of memories"

"Memories?" I am confused

"Yeah, memories" he says with a sigh

What memories, does he have?, shit they must be really bad… ummm

"I'm sorry, home should have only good memories, our home we will have only good memories" I tell him. I feel good, like I have found the right words to say.

He turns and looks at me with a frown, then he smiles, a radiant smile that actually lights up his eyes, I He has never smiled like that before, I smile too, glad talking about our home makes him this happy.

"No, Tanya, they are not bad memories, they are good memories, beautiful memories, best years of my life" his smile larger and getting larger as he pauses as if lost in a memory or two, after a while, he says softly looking out the plane window "I would give anything , do anything, be anything just to… just to relive one of those days. Just one day, I don't care which day I get, I would tell Bel…. Uh uh,….I, I" He stops, takes a deep breath and says "I want a do over"


	9. Chapter 9

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga.

Before I said the chapters would be short and some will be long, I have no idea how many chapters it will be in the end. This is my very first attempt at writing.

Chapter 9

**Emmett**

I wake with a start, disorientated, the pale green walls, magnifying the feeling of unease, a small wave of panic rising in me, small hands touching my face, brings me back to focus,

" Daddy where is mama? , Charlotte, Char my baby girl, a calm rolls thru me, this is no longer my home, I am only visiting, trying to see if I can mend the riff for my daughter's sake. Family is important. I having been telling myself this since the day Char was born. This is what I believed, this is what I wanted for Char and Rosalie, but the last few days here is a reality check and I realize this more about me tying to find love and acceptance from my own family.

"I don't know pumpkin", I say, "Let's go find her"

"She is in the barroom" Char pipes up.

"Why don't you stay here while I go check on her", she shakes her head, her blond curls bouncing with each shake of her head. The color of her hair is the same as Rose's. Rose's hair is a rich, bright blond, that shines like spun gold. The difference is Rose's hair is straight and cascades down her back, long and sleek, while Char's is curly, the curls are all mine.

"I will be right back, I need to help mommy and I need you to keep Bunny safe", I say as I pass her the yellow stuffed bunny rabbit. The "Bunny" has sure seen better days, it was Charlie's first, he had given it her. We were all surprised as he and "Bunny" were never apart.

She looks at me and nods her head, holding on to Bunny.

I know Rose is fighting morning sickness, she was never sick a day when she was pregnant with Char, but this time around she is making up for it, it will pass, she just needs a few slow hours in the morning and then she is good for the rest of the day.

I knock softly on the door, "Rosie, it's me Emmett, let me in"

The door opens, I slip in, she looks pale and I can smell the puke, I place my hand on her waist and pull her to me as sit on the edge of the tub, folding her in my arms while trying not to jostle her too much. I pull off my tee shirt and turn on the lower shower faucet, wetting my tee shirt. I begin wiping her face and neck. She sighs, "That feels good, your tee shirt?" she half chuckles, smacking my chest.

"Hey, it smells like me, you always say my smell calms you"

Smiling with a bit of humor in her voice she says " It is your smell that has me like this" , her smacks turning into soft caresses, she is trying hard to change my somber mood, I hate seeing her like this, she knows and always tries to down play how she is feeling. This is who my Rosie has grown into, not the jaded, bitter girl that walked into my dump of a bar then to apply for the waitressing job.

I hug her closer, "I know baby, I am sorry it has to be like this"

"Silly man, it's not your fault, it's just a part of being pregnant, I was lucky the first time, remember Bella, she was puking till the very end."

"Char is awake, why don't you go back to bed for a bit. I will clean up the bathroom and get Char fed." I tell her, I just want her to feel better and this is only way I know how. I want to take care of her.

"Emmett, I am fine, I only.."

"Rose please let me do this. You could use the rest", I say cutting her off, "please baby, let me take care of you"

"Ok", she says, kissing me on the cheek, she rises, brushes her teeth, while trying not to gag, washes her face and with one more kiss on my cheek, heads to the bedroom. Leaving me to clean up and take a quick shower.


	10. Chapter 10

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. Not Beta'ed all mistakes are my own. I am looking for a Beta.

Chapter 10

Jasper

Alice has been a restless on the flight from Seattle to Los Angles; we are connecting in LA, our final destination, Hawaii, the island of Kauai. Our honeymoon, why I waited so long to marry her, I don't know. It was like I was waiting her my whole life, she actually told me this, the first time met, her exact words to me were " You kept me waiting a long time, I have been waiting for you for a long time"

We depart the plane making our way to the connecting flight, the layover is 3 hours, so there is no need to rush, Alice stops suddenly, she turns, looks at me and says "This is wrong Jasper, we have to go back"

Go back, I am confused as to where back means, but not confused about her sudden change of plans. Alice has this sense, a knowing of things to come, she never knows what will happen, only a feeling. I once asked her how she knows and how does it work, she described it feelings, a feeling of dread, or of rightness and using those feelings as a guide to make decisions.

"Back where?" I ask

"We need to go to Bella", she pauses, stills and says again, "yeah, we need to go to Bella right now, Jasper, we need to head back now"

"What about Kauai? We had this trip planned for months"

"I'm sorry", she says, "I just feel we must go back, I don't know why but something is telling me we need to be with her and Charlie"

I want to be irritated with her for changing our plans, but I can't, this is my Alice and she has never been wrong yet, so if she feels we must be with Bella and Charlie, then so be it.

"Let check and see what flights I can find" , I say as I start to head over to the nearest ticket counter.

"I am really sorry Jasper", her smile is soft but her eyes are sad. I know it is because she feels like she has disappointed me, I give her a quick kiss and say, "don't worry baby, I love you and your crazy sixth sense, I mean it brought me and you together"

Amazingly, we manage to get a flight to Seattle that leaves in 20 minutes, we have to rush and just make it.

"I feel better, this is the right thing" she says as we are airborne," I feel lighter already, thanks Jazz"

Slipping my hand in hers, I say "I can't wait to see Bella's face when we show up 2 weeks ahead of schedule"

"She is so going to freak "Alice says a huge smile on her face.


	11. Chapter 11

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. I will update weekly. All mistakes are my own. I am looking for a Beta.

Chapter 11

**Bella**

"Bella! Bella Swan is that you?

I look up. Lauren Mallory is the cashier. We were in school together and she had the biggest crush on Edward, not mention she was the biggest gossip in high school, I wonder if that has changed, for the first time since returning to Forks, I am anxious, maybe I should have stayed like Emmett suggested. Unknown to him his mother had told me that I was not welcome and would have preferred that I leave as soon as possible. So I did, never telling Emmett the real reason I left. The visit to his parents was important to him. He and his mom had parted on bad terms and he wanted to mend their relationship as well as develop a relationship with is younger brother and sister, however I could see that his siblings were just as mean as his mom. His stepfather was not around much, when he was there, he would watch television, drinking and yelling for someone to bring him ice. No wonder Emmett left as soon as he turned 18.

"Omygod" , she says looking at me, " I can't believe it , wow, umm, I saw Mrs. Cullen a few weeks ago and she mentioned that Edward was coming home for 4th of July, but I didn't know you were too", she rambles on. Lauren always rambles, something's never change. She still loves to talk. "But then again where ever Edward is, there is Bella. I always knew you guys would be together"

Unknowingly I must have tighten my grip Charlie, because I hear him wince, I look down and he is looking at me with wide eyes, the splitting image of his dad's bottle green eyes. I loosen my grip and just smile at Lauren, I don't say anything. She zooms in on Charlie,

"I didn't know you guys had a child, wow! he looks just like his dad, Esme never said." She looks at Charlie again. "I am Lauren" she says pointing to her name badge, "what's your name? let me guess , Edward jr " she says laughing as if she said something funny.

Charlie looks at her and says "My name is Charlie Edward Swan" then he becomes shy bends his head and stare at the floor

"Well nice to meet you Charlie" Lauren says, "You look just like your dad"

I guess she missed the Swan part, when Charlie said his name, but that is Lauren, she never really listens, always intent on taking over conversations. Some things never change.

You know my dad? Charlie asks suddenly

"Oh yes", Lauren says, "we all went to high school together and he could play a mean guitar, all the girls loved him, but he only had eyes for your mom".

"I can play the guitar, but I love the drumsss best", Charlie says "and my mom plays the piano and sings with Aunt Rose and Uncle Jasper, but they are not married, Uncle Jasper is married to Aunt Alice and they are on the moon. Aunt Rose is married to Uncle Emmett. They are coming soon and I get to see Char" Charlie continues.

Another person in the line huffs, "hey Lauren, we are in hurry, could ring us up"

"Sure" she says scowling at the person behind me. She prattles on as she rings up our groceries talking about high school and how good it is to see me.

I thank Lauren as I leave. I am in a state of panic, how long before everyone knows, Bella Swan is back in town and she has a son, Edward's son. I need to call Emmett.


	12. Chapter 12

I do not claim ownership of the Twilight Saga. I will update weekly. All mistakes are my own. I am looking for a Beta.

Chapter 12

**Esme**

The Swan family house was rented and handled by the law firm in Port Angeles, Jenks & Jenks. Calvin Jenks Sr. the lawyer handling the Swan estate would give no information on his client. Bella had not left a forwarding address, not that I accepted what he said. I looked for her, called Jenks repeatedly and finally after 5 months he simply told me, Ms. Swan was very specific with her request, the house was to be rented to cover the mortgage any excess was to be put into an account for repairs and all information about his client was privileged information and he could not share it. I had asked him to pass on messages to Bella previously. I wanted Bella to know that I was looking for her, wanted to find her.

I asked if he had passed on my messages and it was then he stated that if "Ms. Swan wanted to contact me she would and could, but his office would not provide any information and to stop calling and dropping by unannounced. Only then did I fully understand that Bella was aware I was looking for her and she was choosing not to make contact. I was deeply hurt, devastated, consumed with anger and frustration. What in the name of hell did Edward do that would cause her to end all ties with us.

Edward had returned home the following the summer after much persuasion from his father, having spent the previous holidays apart, refusing to come home for Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I was angry with him, I wanted to know what happened and he refused to say anything, the first couple of times I asked, he just froze, would say I don't want to talk about it and would leave, once he just stared off into space, took a deep shuddering breath and said "Can you please just let it go" then he started avoiding me staying away, coming late, only in my presence when his father was around. Carlisle had forbidden me on questioning Edward; he had said I needed to let it go and my probing only seemed to upset Edward. I just needed to accept they were no longer together.

I refused to accept or listen his reasoning. I wanted to know, needed to know. I made a plan deciding to act when Carlisle had a night shift. Taking a seat in the living room, I waited, knowing Edward's ploy was avoidance. He would return home each evening after I had gone to bed, but not this time.

Looking back today, I could see how focus I was on what had happened. I never really saw/looked at Edward. He had changed, had emptiness around and in him; as if he was on autopilot. Sleep, wake, eat, talk about mundane things , like weather, hiking trails, go hiking all day, back home, eat, sleep repeat.

I had missed it all. I was only focused on what happened, not about him or about Bella, only what happened. I really don't know why I was so focused on the "what". I have rationalized my behavior at that time by thinking it was because I am a mother; believing that as a mother if you have all the facts, you can fix what ails your children. I needed the facts so could fix what had happened and all would be well. Instead I would forever remember that night.

Edward refused yet again to say what happened. I was angry, yelled at him, told him he was selfish, made of stone and that he was deliberately hurting me by not telling me and who know what else I may have said to him. I was so angry. To tell the truth I felt out of control that night, his responses became angrier and angrier telling me he didn't want to talk about it, finally, I had responded in a bitter sarcastic tone telling him I was happy for him that he could just move on as if nothing had happened, but not all of us were that lucky.

In that moment a side of Edward I had never seen emerged, he stood up, dashed over to the fire place where there were photos of him and Bella, in a sweeping movement he shoved then off the mantle with an angry swipe of his hand, did the same to the table lamps, upturned the end- tables, all the while yelling and screaming, it was if he was out of control, anything he could reach, move or throw became airborne. I could not even understand what he was saying, he swore and screamed as if he was in pain all the while tearing up the room. Then he stopped looked around the room his eyes dark and vacant , he appeared to be looking for something and smiled , it was a sad, vacant smile, but in that second he looked at peace and it scared me . He started moving, made about 3 steps, stopped suddenly again, looked down , crumpled to his knees, picked up a photo of him and Bella, that he had stepped on, the glass shattered in the frame, he looked at it, rocking back and forth on his knees, started sobbing and saying " Sorry" over and over again. I sat there stunned, almost unable to process what had happened. I watched him rocking back and forth crying and clutching the photo, saying sorry over and over again.

I don't even remember how I made over to him, but I will always, always remember the pained look in his eyes as he looked at me and in that moment I saw his despair, his hopelessness and I knew that he still loved her and she had left him, "O my god, she broke up with you", I had said my voice cracking, trying to hold back my own tears. I wrapped my arms around him; my heart breaking, my baby boy, my baby was in so much pain.

It was hard for me to imagine she had. Bella had loved Edward; she was madly in love with him, just as he was madly in love with her. You had to be around them to understand, it was if they were magnets, he moved, she moved, she moved, he moved, their eyes always connecting, the music they created, singing and writing it, the plans they made, they brought the best in each other, it was inconceivable at times, they had started dating freshman year, I don't even think they ever had a fight or spat over those four years. I myself had not expected it to last, they were teenagers after all and they had proved me and many wrong. He collapses in my arms and say " I fucked up Mom, I fucked up, I lost her, I lost her Mom, I don't know where she is" hugging me as if I am his lifeline , We slip flat to the floor somehow, his head in in my lap , his arms wrapped around me and he says" I hurt her Mom, I hurt her, I don't even know why, I hate me ,I hate everything about me" I had held my son that night and cried with him, for him, for a girl that I considered my daughter who must have been hurt beyond words.

Edward left 2 days later, returned back to NYU, after only spending only 9 days. What I had not seen before I saw in those 2 remaining days, maybe he had let his guard down after that night. He was thinner, pale, dark circles under his eyes, withdrawn. He would sit so still for hours, staring off into space. He neither played nor listened to music and I would hear crying at night as stood outside the bedroom door. I was afraid he would commit suicide. I had called him every day after he left. Sometimes, he answered, sometimes a whole week went by before I heard from him. I was angry at Bella for hurting him like she did, for hurting us. She was selfish and self-centered, but knowing deep inside she was never any of those things. I wanted to be mad at someone and all I could do was be mad at her.

Edward went back to school took summer classes , day and night classes, completing his 3 remaining years of college in just under 2 years, he avoided the graduation ceremony, completed 4 years of Medical School and was about to start his residency soon . Today he was coming home after almost 6 years. He had moved on with his life, he appeared to be happy and had a fiancée, who am I to deny him happiness. I would be happy for him. I would always miss and love Bella, but she has made a decision not to include us in her life and I had accepted over the years, no longer angry at her, just saddened. Looking at the car clock, I am reminded that my trip down memory lane was a bit too long.

Grabbing the Ice- Cream, I head to the check out

"Hi Lauren, how are doing?"

"Oh! Hi Mrs. Cullen, I just saw Bella and your grandson, Oh my god! He is the spitting image of Edward, so cute; I didn't know you had a grandson"

"You saw Bella? Bella Swan" my mind in a whirl

"Yes and your grandson", she says slowly. "Your grandson Charlie"

I am sure my heart is beating in my head, Bella, grandson, Bella, grandson, Bella,

"When" I ask

Lauren looks puzzled, "about 3 hours ago, she was grocery shopping"

I grab the ice cream leaving… Bella was here and she has a son, she and Edward had a child "Mrs. Cullen, you didn't pay. "

I turn around, hand her my card, I feel like I am in dream, aware of what I am doing bit not really aware of what I am doing…. Bella is here in forks and has a baby.

Pulling out of the parking lot, I start for the Swan house, when my phone rings, I answer automatically

"Hello"

"Honey, Edward and Tanya are almost here he just called they are 15 minutes away. Where are you? "

"I will be right there; I have another errand to run." I say

"Esme, sweetheart, come home, come home now, it been six years, we should both be here when they arrive"


End file.
